Beware of generalizations!


Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Beware of generalizations!

Beware of generalizations!
lawgirl
Contributor
lawgirl
It concerns me that so many generalizations are made about career women, career men (it should be coined an appropiate term nowadays!), stay at home moms, family, children. etc. As a lawyer and so called career woman, I went to college because I enjoy learning and contributing to society on different levels. I hope to become a mother and am confident that I will be an excellent one! Having a job, which I need in order to pay my bills along with my partner, will certainly not be my priority when I have a a family just as it is not my #1 priority now. Family has always been my priority because the reason for studying and working is not only to learn but to be able to afford and enjoy the things I love with those I love.
On the other hand, if we are merely talking about marrying non career woman because they will automatically make you happier, you are seriously kidding yourself. People are different, we want different things. So your generalization is unfair and untrue.
And most importantly, if you want to reduce such a complex issue to mere speculations based on alledged articules and studies, then pay atention to more important well founded inestigations regarding violence against women. Following your train of thought, then women should never get involved with men since the Family Violence Prevention Fund has found the following:
Estimates range from 960,000 incidents of violence against a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend per year1 to three million women who are physically abused by their husband or boyfriend per year.2
Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused during her lifetime.3
Nearly one-third of American women (31 percent) report being physically or sexually abused by a husband or boyfriend at some point in their lives, according to a 1998 Commonwealth Fund survey.4
Nearly 25 percent of American women report being raped and/or physically assaulted by a current or former spouse, cohabiting partner, or date at some time in their lifetime, according to the National Violence Against Women Survey, conducted from November 1995 to May 1996.5
Thirty percent of Americans say they know a woman who has been physically abused by her husband or boyfriend in the past year.6
In the year 2001, more than half a million American women (588,490 women) were victims of nonfatal violence committed by an intimate partner.7
Intimate partner violence is primarily a crime against women. In 2001, women accounted for 85 percent of the victims of intimate partner violence (588,490 total) and men accounted for approximately 15 percent of the victims (103,220 total).8
While women are less likely than men to be victims of violent crimes overall, women are five to eight times more likely than men to be victimized by an intimate partner.9
In 2001, intimate partner violence made up 20 percent of violent crime against women. The same year, intimate partners committed three percent of all violent crime against men.10
As many as 324,000 women each year experience intimate partner violence during their pregnancy.11
Women of all races are about equally vulnerable to violence by an intimate.12
Male violence against women does much more damage than female violence against men; women are much more likely to be injured than men.13
The most rapid growth in domestic relations caseloads is occurring in domestic violence filings. Between 1993 and 1995, 18 of 32 states with three year filing figures reported an increase of 20 percent or more.14
Women are seven to 14 times more likely than men to report suffering severe physical assaults from an intimate partner.15
Domestic Homicides

On average, more than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends in this country every day. In 2000, 1,247 women were killed by an intimate partner. The same year, 440 men were killed by an intimate partner.16
Women are much more likely than men to be killed by an intimate partner. In 2000, intimate partner homicides accounted for 33.5 percent of the murders of women and less than four percent of the murders of men.17
Pregnant and recently pregnant women are more likely to be victims of homicide than to die of any other cause18 , and evidence exists that a significant proportion of all female homicide victims are killed by their intimate partners.19
Research suggests that injury related deaths, including homicide and suicide, account for approximately one-third of all maternal mortality cases, while medical reasons make up the rest. But, homicide is the leading cause of death overall for pregnant women, followed by cancer, acute and chronic respiratory conditions, motor vehicle collisions and drug overdose, peripartum and postpartum cardiomyopthy, and suicide.20
Health Issues

The health-related costs of rape, physical assault, stalking and homicide committed by intimate partners exceed $5.8 billion each year. Of that amount, nearly $4.1 billion are for direct medical and mental health care services, and nearly $1.8 billion are for the indirect costs of lost productivity or wages.21
About half of all female victims of intimate violence report an injury of some type, and about 20 percent of them seek medical assistance.22
Thirty-seven percent of women who sought treatment in emergency rooms for violence-related injuries in 1994 were injured by a current or former spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend.23

So when stating opinions, which I appreciate since they are the fiber of free speech and our society, just be sure to acknowledge that not all of us are a certain way. Certainly a lot of men are very happy with career women as is my case and so many others I have read in the comments…And equally, probably a lot of women are happy with lazy men who cherish them! Just as many stay at homes are very happy with their lives and are not TRAPPED (how dramatic!) and it should be said, provide an essential part of family life.
Hope we can all continue to agree to disagree in a fair way!

08-25-2006 11:55 AM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
LL
Contributor
LL

Are some things generalizations, or are some things trends?

However, remember when taking statistics in regard to domestic violence and battered women, a lot of the statistics are inflated to fit what they want to show.

-LL

08-25-2006 12:11 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
bekis
Contributor
bekis

Perhaps, but then the same can be said of any study, including the ones cited in this editorial, and the skew of the editorial effects what statistics he chooses to display.  And therein lies the problem with this “debate.”

Everyone is coming into this with a point of view, and they will cite anything that supports that and deny anything that doesn’t, because heaven forbid anyone be allowed to disagree.

Ahhh, America, the land of the free….?

08-25-2006 12:19 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
lawgirl
Contributor
lawgirl
Precisely my point, I used violence against women as an example of the line of reasoning followed by his stating “don´t marry career women”. If we were to reduce our life choices to studies such as the ones I cited or he did, then we would remain alone and severely confused about what´s out there. The studies cited are not the only ones discussing those topics, and as you said, you can use any study to support your position (Tom Cruise anyone?).
Generalizations such as the one made by the author of this article are misleading because they are not necessarily accurate represetations. The statistics I provided are merely suggestive of a possible problem, taking into consideration that the pool of participants is essential in determining the validity of the results. Also, in regards to violence, all cases that go unreported are evidently not taken into consideration.
My proposition relies on the notion that every person has to determine what she or he wants in a partner, in life, professionally and personally, and certainly, having a career does not always affect your relationship negatively.

08-25-2006 01:46 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
lawgirl
Contributor
lawgirl
I was wondering what you referred to when you say some things are a trend. I certainly don´t think careers or domestic violence are trends, especially the last one, I hope! Maybe you mean the dicussion about those topics are trends.
There is no denying that domestic violence, as well as general violence, occurs more frequently than we´d like to admit. And even if the statistics are somewhat manipulated, there is uniformity in the fact that it is happening. An even once is more than enough.
Divorce is complicated as well, and many factors weigh into it. Reducing the failure of a marriage to the fact that a woman works puts the responsability on her to make the marriage work, when in truth, it takes two to make it work and so many things that come into play in a marriage that are not even mentioned by the author. And we should always keep in mind that, even if they would want to, not everyone has the option to stay home with the children.

08-25-2006 01:58 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
IshWishDish
Regular Contributor
IshWishDish

LL, can you explain how exactly domestic violence statistics in particular are inflated? Generally, you see, they’re assumed (like all crimes where perpetrator and victim have a close personal relationship) to be heavily under-reported, so I’m curious where you’ve gotten this information.

08-25-2006 02:05 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
lawgirl
Contributor
lawgirl
Thank you Ish! And sadly, just like child abuse too which is seriously unreported. Too often, I have known cases that never get to authorities…

08-25-2006 02:26 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
Antiriad
Regular Contributor
Antiriad
Your DV stats are fallacious.

Fact: more women commit DV against men than the other way around.

Fact: more women than men abuse their children.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/5092100.stm

http://www.kittennews.com/mag/2006/maxponti_06_01_abs_personal_safety_study.htm

Facts – the ABS survey has revealed that –

*

Men are more than twice as likely as women to be the victims of violence and are being physically or sexually assaulted or threatened at the rate of up to 2 incidents per second
*

Women are not the victims of family (domestic) violence as often as the quoted 1 in 4, nor even 1 in 8, nor even 1 in 10, but actually 1 in 100
*

Women are not being raped every 26 seconds, nor even every 90 seconds, as feminists frequently claim, but are in fact experiencing sexual assault – not necessarily rape – including both reported and all unreported incidents, at a rate of less than 1 per 5 minutes. This is a rate 91% less than that which feminists have previously claimed
* The ratio of female to male family (domestic) violence victims in a home is not 99:1, nor 9:1, nor even 5:1, but is actually closer to 2:1

More than half of women questioned at a Glasgow university said they approved of wives hitting their husbands.

The Glasgow Caledonian students were among 6,500 women surveyed from 36 universities for an international study into attitudes on domestic violence.

Of the 200 women, 60% said it was acceptable for women to hit their husbands while 35% admitted assaulting their partner.

A total of 8% admitted injuring them – the highest rate in the study.

Message Edited by Antiriad on 08-25-2006 03:17 PM

08-25-2006 03:15 PM

Re: Beware of generalizations!
lawgirl
Contributor
lawgirl
Again, statistics can be used wichever way you wasnt them to like I mentioned before.
Then again, I am wondering where do you live???
Just watching the news about women being sold as sexual slaves in Cambodia, raped in Chad because they go out to get food (beacuase if their huusbands go they will be killed), shot because she cheated in Puerto Rico…give me a break!
Most domestic violence laws in most states as well as Puerto Rico were enacted because of widepsread and generalized violence against women. Check the legsilative intent in most of them! Those are not statistics!
FYI: Check the World Health Organmization website so you can get a real view of violence against women.
This does not imply that violence against men isn´t just as horrible and also takes place.
And also, I did not say that men abuse their children more often than women do, I said child abuse is highly unrreported and is a terrible thing, just like domestic violence is. And my quote regarding the incidence of domestic violence was intended to show how if we follow every supposedly valid statistic out there, then every step we make would be a mistake, since we are then alaways doomed to fail and suffer at every try, which is certainly totally untrue.

08-25-2006 03:27 PM

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