Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?


Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?

Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
chulaa7
Newbie
chulaa7

Between the constant need for more & better materialistic “things” and the “me too” or “if he/she can do it, I can do it too”, there is less and less room for families.  Relationships are demanding in themselves.  When you add a helpless, needy child to the mix, adults become 5 year olds – male AND female.  Marriage and family equal sacrifice and compromise.  Having a demanding career takes away from your ability or desire to sacrifice/compromise.  Whether it’s late nights at the office because you HAVE to finish that proposal or it’s a trip you can’t miss for your daughter’s recital/son’s game; it’s a juggling game.  If I don’t work my butt off, I won’t get that promotion and make more money which will help me buy that play set (or for the more selfish – that new sports car) which will make me happy.

I don’t know what the solution is, but I don’t think it’s simply a question of marrying a career woman or a lazy man – it’s about materialism, priorities and compromise.

08-29-2006 01:23 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
GenghisKhan
Regular Contributor
GenghisKhan
Well said.

08-29-2006 01:28 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
MartianBachelor
Regular Contributor
MartianBachelor

…Marriage and family equal sacrifice and compromise. Having a demanding career takes away from your ability or desire to sacrifice/compromise.

I would say that having a demanding career IS a form of male-only sacrifice/compromise, one for which men are generally under-appreciated.

______________________________________________
“The loudest, most strident voices calling women weak, stupid, and incapable of competing in the world at large are the feminists.” – zed the zen priest

08-29-2006 01:31 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
Jman
Contributor
Jman

Material is good, but the problem lies in when we make material an end, and not a means to an end. You have to ask yourself, whats important in life. Frankly, you can take all the money in the world, it came from ashes and will end up ashes. What I care about is people as well as making sure those I am responsible to get what they need to live. That takes some work. Just remember to ask are you working to live or living to work?

08-29-2006 01:31 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

In most instances there likely is little, if any, compromise as you will find most women will put a priority on what they want in the event of a divorce and the man will be ordered to pay it, in most instances.  Again, a prenuptial removes financial incentive for marriage and boils it down to more esoteric motives.

08-29-2006 01:34 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
Democles
Regular Contributor
Democles

I find it selfish that people want families. Just because you want a family doesn’t mean you are entitled to have one.

08-29-2006 02:02 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
fishnamedjames
Regular Contributor
fishnamedjames
I agree, men don’t get enough appreciation for their sacrifices regarding work expectations. I want to make sure that my husband* will get several years to stay home with the kids since working has always just been a given for him. It’s kind of also ‘just been a given’ for me too, but not in the same way or to the same degree.

*not married yet, happening next year!

08-29-2006 04:48 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
chulaa7
Newbie
chulaa7

Congratulations! I’m sure you’re future husband will be happy to know he’s got a rare breed of women.

08-29-2006 05:01 PM

Re: Materialism is the real issue here – where’s the compromise?
khankrumthebulg
Regular Contributor
khankrumthebulg
When he was the Director of Health and Urban Renewal. Daniel Patrick Moynihan later US Senator complained in an oped piece in 1965 of the appalling 25% of Black Families that were headed by Single Women. When the Great Society Programs incented Women to remove Black Fathers from their Families 100 years of Black Progress were reveresed. A cruel Social Experiment was begun. Whenever you subsidize any behavior you will get more of it. We have subsidized Divorce and created financial incentives for Women to bail on Husbands. This public policy promoted by Big Governments Advocates has got us to where we are today.

Men don’t and cannot place their trust in Women. Not while there are no disincentives for Women to “Cash Out” on their husbands. Anything else is wishful thinking not based upon objective reality and human nature. Men lack real incentives to Marry. And weighing their options are opting out. Until Women demand a return to equity and fairness that will not change.

09-01-2006 03:51 PM

==============================================================================
Click on the board or message subject at the top to return.

Advertisements
%d bloggers like this: