Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?


Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?

Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Annabel25
Visitor
Annabel25

I’ve got to say that I don’t.  For most of my friends and colleagues, the issue of dating “career women” is just not even on the radar.  And as for thinking that it is a woman’s role to be a homemaker and women should “subjugate” themselves to men, I have never met ANYONE who thinks like that.

I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that the male posters espousing such views are in fact Forbes staffers amusing themselves during a slow day in the office.

But if not, who are these guys? Where do they work? And why are they so bitter about women?

08-31-2006 08:58 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Celticgirl
Contributor
Celticgirl
In short – no!

08-31-2006 09:20 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
3rdworldwm
Regular Contributor
3rdworldwm

No.

08-31-2006 09:24 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Cassius
Regular Contributor
Cassius
We are not bitter about women we are bitter about what has become of marriage and what it keeps in store for men. For 2 out of 3 men marriage does not end well. It is a win win situation for women. Iamgine a man gets a pot of gold for shooting his wife. All the wife can do is hoping really hard he will not put the pot of gold above her. We have no problem with women or to make sex with women. At least i dont. But why marry and subjucate myself to courts, judges and lawyers ?
Besides it would be perfectly okay for me to stay home while the wife would do all the money. Is any of you willing to put up with that ? Thought so.

Message Edited by Cassius on 08-31-2006 09:39 AM

08-31-2006 09:35 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
porkchops38
Regular Contributor
porkchops38

Annabel25 wrote:
I’ve got to say that I don’t.  For most of my friends and colleagues, the issue of dating “career women” is just not even on the radar.  And as for thinking that it is a woman’s role to be a homemaker and women should “subjugate” themselves to men, I have never met ANYONE who thinks like that.

I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that the male posters espousing such views are in fact Forbes staffers amusing themselves during a slow day in the office.

But if not, who are these guys? Where do they work? And why are they so bitter about women?

I’m not going to claim I speak for all men or any group of men other than my close buddies — the guys I work with, hunt with, fish with, play poker with, etc….. So here’s your answer cupcake…. As for my buddies and I, we are the guys that work in your office or the office in the next building. We would never tell you what we fully believe in a work setting face to face because if we did, you women would use your double-standard preferential treatment system that is rigged to favor women, and you would cry like little babies to your fascist masters to have us men fired, and then we would be fired from our jobs simply for exercising our rights to free speech and god-given right of freedom of conscience.

So, we just go with the fascist matriarchal system and smile at you and tell you nice pretty words when face to face, all the while working, saving, investing, enjoying life, and making certain that we don’t invite a western fascist cat-loving nazi woman into our lives in any permanent way, to ruin it. As for dating, similar rules apply in the dating scene and in the workplace setting. Basically, in the dating arena I just tell women what they WANT to hear, that’s all. This is what feminism, in all its’ shapes and forms, has relegated a large part of society into, it’s a fascist system where anyone that does not “tow the party line” will face punishment (financial punishment at work, or intimacy punishment while dating). So, outwardly, I have been forced to “tow the party line”, while inwardly I believe what I believe and live my life by my beliefs which are totally contrary to much of what the fascist masters try to force me to believe. It’s not that difficult to do, as you can see, when I am a anonymous poster here, I believe I have articulated my true beliefs into words well enough on this board.

I don’t even know why I bother articulating my anonymous beliefs here for either, I should just continue to “tow the party line” here too, but I guess I would chalk-it-up to here being one of the tiny few places where a man can speak his true mind, here where I can’t get fired for what I say here and I can’t get denied a psssy pass for what I say here.

Enjoy your morning coffee! I know I am! 🙂

08-31-2006 09:55 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

You really can’t be that stupid, can you? Why is it that only fat fugly women complain about being “subjugated” (which, to be frank, never happens anyway)?

08-31-2006 10:17 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
BeachBagLady
Newbie
BeachBagLady
Cassius wrote:
Besides it would be perfectly okay for me to stay home while the wife would do all the money. Is any of you willing to put up with that ? Thought so.
—–

Do you honestly believe that there are no households where this is the case? I am not only willing to put up with it, I encourage it. My husband is a great nurturer and does a wonderful job of raising our two kids; we are fortunate/blessed enough to be able to live on one (very good) salary. He is more calm and even-keeled than I am, so the kids benefit from his influence more than if he was bringin’ home the bacon and on the road all the time.

His job is not any easier than mine; it’s just different. It’s the neighborhood guys who have the problem with it – they don’t understand how he can be ‘manly/macho with an apron on’. Talk about neanderthal thinking – like them pulling a paycheck equates to their manliness or makes them better lovers. Yeah, right. The wives talk – so I know THAT ain’t true…

08-31-2006 10:54 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
bachiatari
Newbie
bachiatari

You are so right. Punishment for expressing our minds is inevitable in relationships and at work. We work with these women who think they know our true opinions about this whole thing and that is not true.

I mean one thing is “towing with the party” and the other truly expressing yourself. I work for one of the biggest companies in the world. The brand is very respected. And it indeed has some of the toughest women I know, they are professional, driven, and highly educated. Most of the female managers I know are over 40 and have no kids. The only female director of sales has no kids, she is 39. The VP of sales has two girls, but she only represents maybe of 2% of the professional women I know in my building.

I have a witness of how women now frown with the thought of having children. Or they now opt for getting Smith-Jones… putting their husbands names attached to theirs with a dash. I simply cannot believe it. I guess nowadays, you must be very careful with whom you marry.

What is so wrong with a woman that stays at home? I would definitely love one. I’d make her the center of my life; however, career women have this pursuit of making it clear that, like men, they can do anything. And they can, but it will be at the expense of families. There is got to be a relatioship between women with careers and the astronomical rates of divorce now.

In the 1950’s women were proud of being housewives. Divorce rates were down. And dont get me wrong, some men are dishonest, abusive, and unfaithful. But overall, the US was a much stronger nation. The kids of the 50s and 60s have strong up-bringing. They believed in family. But what happened to their kids. The kids of the late 60s, 70s, and 80s. Now, it’s changed. And women will never be the same again.

08-31-2006 11:06 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Antiriad
Regular Contributor
Antiriad

BeachBagLady wrote:
It’s the neighborhood guys who have the problem with it – they don’t understand how he can be ‘manly/macho with an apron on’. Talk about neanderthal thinking – like them pulling a paycheck equates to their manliness or makes them better lovers. Yeah, right. The wives talk – so I know THAT ain’t true…

Talk about pinko fascist feminazi thinking; your husband is whipped, it doesn’t matter what words you use to describe it or what words he uses to describe it. You both live in a fundamentally delusional and absurd paradigm that is bound to fail in the long run. Your ancestors will look with shame at the way you lived.

08-31-2006 11:07 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
BeachBagLady
Newbie
BeachBagLady

Antiriad wrote:

BeachBagLady wrote:
It’s the neighborhood guys who have the problem with it – they don’t understand how he can be ‘manly/macho with an apron on’. Talk about neanderthal thinking – like them pulling a paycheck equates to their manliness or makes them better lovers. Yeah, right. The wives talk – so I know THAT ain’t true…

Talk about pinko fascist feminazi thinking; your husband is whipped, it doesn’t matter what words you use to describe it or what words he uses to describe it. You both live in a fundamentally delusional and absurd paradigm that is bound to fail in the long run. Your ancestors will look with shame at the way you lived.

Cassius wrote:

Besides it would be perfectly okay for me to stay home while the wife would do all the money. Is any of you willing to put up with that ? Thought so.

So let me get this straight now – because Cassius suggests it, it’s OK. Because my husband does it, I’m a pinko fascist feminazi, and he’s whipped. Yeah, you’re right. I definitely see the ‘logic’ there.

08-31-2006 11:20 AM

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Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
MartianBachelor
Regular Contributor
MartianBachelor
“do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?”

Since i’d guess your everyday life is not about seeking out dissident views, this is hardly a surprise. Mere selection effects. “I haven’t seen it, therefore it doesn’t exist”. Guess you’re getting an eyefull…

Yes, we’re covert and underground, but that doesn’t mean we’re not part of “real life”, as you put it.

I’m nowhere near being a Forbes staffer. I don’t think I’ve ever picked up a copy of their magazine.

Nice try, but sorely lacking in imagination.

Message Edited by MartianBachelor on 08-31-2006 09:28 AM

______________________________________________
“The loudest, most strident voices calling women weak, stupid, and incapable of competing in the world at large are the feminists.” – zed the zen priest

08-31-2006 11:22 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Cassius
Regular Contributor
Cassius
Beach Lady its nice for you that it works out however women willing to make all of the money are rarer than successfull marriages. All of the other career women are looking for the investment banker, doctor of their dreams. Between I know of one marriage the woman divorced the guy and everyone is all how the poor thing has to pay a small amount of alimony to his ex. Of course if he would have been the provider the alimony couldnt have been big enough.

Message Edited by Cassius on 08-31-2006 02:38 PM

08-31-2006 12:28 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
GenghisKhan
Regular Contributor
GenghisKhan

Annabel25 wrote:
I’ve got to say that I don’t.  For most of my friends and colleagues, the issue of dating “career women” is just not even on the radar.  And as for thinking that it is a woman’s role to be a homemaker and women should “subjugate” themselves to men, I have never met ANYONE who thinks like that.

I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that the male posters espousing such views are in fact Forbes staffers amusing themselves during a slow day in the office.

But if not, who are these guys? Where do they work? And why are they so bitter about women?

How would you know? Another poster concisely explained why we don’t tell you our views in the working world. I’ll talk a little bit about the dating world. You see, when men go out in the dating world we are looking for one thing – sex. And most men will do anything to get sex from women, just like women will do anything to get a committment from men. Like another poster astutely pointed out – men ration committment and women ration sex. This is the dynamics of male/female intimate relationships. So you only know what a man wishes you to know to get sex from you. For instance, I have no problem having sex or dating a career woman or a woman without a career. But when it comes to marriage I am looking for a housewife. Do I tell women this when I’m dating them? no, because during this period I am only looking for sex and committment with no consequences. When I am ready for marriage then I will look for a housewife and weed career women out of my dating pool.

Now before you give me the sanctimonous platitude about how men are deceiving dogs, etc. What men do is no different than a woman hiding her true features with makeup, using tummy tucking underpants to hide her bulging stomach, or putting those plastic chicklet things in her bra to emphasize and accentuate her breasts. So the next time you put on that lipstick and eyeliner, think about who is lying to whom. And go on deluding yourself into thinking that many men “don’t think like this.”

Message Edited by GenghisKhan on 08-31-2006 01:15 PM

08-31-2006 12:49 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

Holy smokes people. Here is my take on it as a working mom with a career that pays me over 30k. I am about to finalize my divorce of 14 years. We didn’t break up because I work or he did not want to stay home with our child. Our marriage was unsuccessful because we did not do exactly what we should have done- be honest and fair and share all of the resposibilities a two income household couple should.

This BS about men should only seek to marry someone who’ll take care of the house, the kids, the pets, and yet still find time to take care of him too. Come on. We are attracted to people based on looks and personality and interests. Pretty basic. People stay together due to the fact that they work and play well together over the long haul. It has nothing to do with of the work status of the couple.

08-31-2006 12:51 PM

A very few…
anonymom
Contributor
anonymom

But they are just acquaintances, and not people I would ever be friends with (except for one of my brothers, who thinks women are sex objects/servants who exist to serve him, and he is on his 3rd wife, with kids by each of them, and all he does is complain about women and divorce lawyers… funny though, the common denominator in all of those train wrecks is HIM).

I think the reason some of the men in this forum are being so extreme is because they have a place where they can say these things anonymously.  People say a lot of things on boards that they wouldn’t say in real life, or would only say to people that are like-minded.  If people publicly said some of the things they are saying here, it would get ugly fast.

I have found this whole thing really interesting, because it shows just how angry and hateful some people are.

In addition, although I know that the statistics show that half of couples get divorced, I am friends with very few that actually have gotten divorced in my circle of college/grad school/professional acquaintances.  I think it is because we all sowed our wild oats early in life, waiting until we were older to get married, and then married based on compatibility/mutual interest in raising a family/love, not lust/money/having fun.

The couples that I do know that have gotten divorced are ones where the husband dumped the 40ish wife and kids for a younger piece of “arm candy.”  There are many stay-at-home-moms in my community that are constantly undergoing plastic surgery/enhancements to keep their successful husbands from wandering.  I used to play Bunco with some neighborhood women and had to stop because it was too depressing.  None of them were career women, by the way.

After reading these boards, I am SO thankful that I met and married my DH.  15 years an counting!  And (gasp!) I work full time and he stays home, and our kids are healthy, happy and well-adjusted.

08-31-2006 01:23 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Back2TheKitchen
Regular Contributor
Back2TheKitchen
We keep our views to ourselves.

We know it’s useless discussing such topics with you.

More and more men are disconnecting from the Fematrix everyday.

We are unplugged from the United States of Feminism.

“With women or the female mindset imparted through feminization on the vast majority of society, it will be very easy to control the Empire…I mean…the republic.” – mirrorofthesoul.blogspot.com

08-31-2006 01:24 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
PatriarchVerlch
Regular Contributor
PatriarchVerlch

Divorce rates in the 50’s were 10%. Hardly a pandemic. Low crime, no fatherlessnees. Out of wedlock births were frowned at. Now they are our nation tax funds 700,000 out of wedlock births a year. I guess the Prison Labor Union, the largets Union in the world, wants a steady stream of Fatherless Criminals from the inner cities to pour in. All tax payer funded.

Women were largely out of the workforce, wages were up because women had not flooded the market. Now 75% of women work in poverty wage jobs. Real wages have not increased since 1970, cost of living sure has. The market has charged what the market will bear. The market bears a working Husband and wife. Good job ladies, you have upset the economy. Well you and all the immigrants driving wages down.

Women have been proving for the last 30 years that men have been right for the last 30 centuries!
http://www.verlch.blogspot.com

08-31-2006 01:27 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
porkchops38
Regular Contributor
porkchops38

HSC wrote:

Our marriage was unsuccessful because we did not do exactly what we should have done- be honest and fair and share all of the resposibilities a two income household couple should.

Another mangina husband bites the dust! You go grrllll!!! Tell that p-whipped mangina sissy boy to get his crap to the curb!!! Tell him to grow a set and act like a man! It’s all about YOU cupcake! You are the JUDGE, JURY, AND EXECUTIONER of what constitutes “fairness” and “sharing”. I like ‘career women’ like you, you are typical of the women who beg me to let them blank me after lunch or after work. Just don’t tell me about how many kids you have while you are blanking me off, it kinda ruins the moment cuz I view mangina husbands as deserving of what they get but when you take your selfish desires out on your kids that kinda spoils the moment for me. Anyways, KUDOS to you for kicking the mangina to the curb, hopefully now he’ll grow a set and be a real man!

08-31-2006 01:29 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
juliandroms
Regular Contributor
juliandroms

You *think* you don’t know many men who think like many of the men who are on this board, but in reality you do.

And not all the guys here think that women should stay in the home. A lot of them would simply be satisfied if the majority of women stopped being bitches.

08-31-2006 01:53 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
zacharias
Regular Contributor
zacharias

juliandroms wrote:

And not all the guys here think that women should stay in the home. A lot of them would simply be satisfied if the majority of women stopped being bitches.

AMEN!!!!

08-31-2006 01:57 PM

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Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

I like ‘career women’ like you, you are typical of the women who beg me to let them blank me after lunch or after work. Just don’t tell me about how many kids you have while you are blanking me off, it kinda ruins the moment cuz I view mangina husbands as deserving of what they get but when you take your selfish desires out on your kids that kinda spoils the moment for me. Anyways, KUDOS to you for kicking the mangina to the curb, hopefully now he’ll grow a set and be a real man!

A. I am not “typical” and B. I’ve never begged anyone to let me do anything to them….You are the exact reason why so many women would rather work at a career than a relationship with a peach like you. You are a really treat. Enjoy your bimbo banging. You will very old and very lonely.

Are all men this angry at women for wanting a career ?

08-31-2006 02:01 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
GenghisKhan
Regular Contributor
GenghisKhan
Are all men this angry at women for wanting a career ?
____________________________________________________

I’m not angry at them at all. I think its great that they are doing what they choose to do. I just don’t find them attractive as spouses.

08-31-2006 02:10 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

But why is that ?

08-31-2006 02:13 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
GenghisKhan
Regular Contributor
GenghisKhan

HSC wrote:
But why is that ?

I don’t need to give an explanation as it is my free choice, but if you really want to know here’s why:
1) my parents have the traditional marriage – dad is the provider, mom is the housewife. Now, this isn’t to say that this arrangement means a 100% successful marriage. But, looking at how far I have come in life I owe a lot to how I was raised within the dynamics of this marital arrangment. I think this was largely due to the fact that they didn’t have competing and conflicting priorities. Dad was the best provider he could be and mom was the best housewife she could be. Together they shared everything (finances, property, etc.) and made decisions together. This provided the ideal environment for me and my brother to be raised in.
2) This is the same enviroment I would want for my family when I decide to get married. Since I will only get married to start and raise a family (because to me this is the only logical reason to get married in this social and legal environment) a housewife best suits this position and the dynamic I wish to create.

Message Edited by GenghisKhan on 08-31-2006 02:37 PM

08-31-2006 02:33 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

Who really cares, it just makes them less of a prospect to men who wish to have a family.  They are not the best choice.   Men vote with their feet by leaving.

08-31-2006 02:34 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
ftesyektsi
Regular Contributor
ftesyektsi

Annabel25 wrote:
I’ve got to say that I don’t.  For most of my friends and colleagues, the issue of dating “career women” is just not even on the radar.  And as for thinking that it is a woman’s role to be a homemaker and women should “subjugate” themselves to men, I have never met ANYONE who thinks like that.

I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that the male posters espousing such views are in fact Forbes staffers amusing themselves during a slow day in the office.

But if not, who are these guys? Where do they work? And why are they so bitter about women?

I discussed this last night with a friend, and here were the prevailing theories:

1.  The men on these boards are of a very specific demographic.  Career-types in the city, maybe being confronted by women in the workforce who are equally aggressive and ambitious and who pose a threat.  Maybe the men are thinking back to the good ol’ days when the only ones they had to compete with were one another.

2.  The men on these boards are wealthier, probably conservative/traditional, and haven’t quite gotten used to the idea of women as actual people.

I know no men like the ones I’ve seen here, either.  The closest I’ve met is an older guy I interviewed with a few days ago who said, “How does your husband feel about you working?”  Were I not already sitting, I’d probably have fallen over.

08-31-2006 02:43 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
ftesyektsi
Regular Contributor
ftesyektsi

Back2TheKitchen wrote:
We keep our views to ourselves.

We know it’s useless discussing such topics with you.

More and more men are disconnecting from the Fematrix everyday.

We are unplugged from the United States of Feminism.

oh, brother

08-31-2006 02:45 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Cassius
Regular Contributor
Cassius

HSC wrote:
I like ‘career women’ like you, you are typical of the women who beg me to let them blank me after lunch or after work. Just don’t tell me about how many kids you have while you are blanking me off, it kinda ruins the moment cuz I view mangina husbands as deserving of what they get but when you take your selfish desires out on your kids that kinda spoils the moment for me. Anyways, KUDOS to you for kicking the mangina to the curb, hopefully now he’ll grow a set and be a real man!

A. I am not “typical” and B. I’ve never begged anyone to let me do anything to them….You are the exact reason why so many women would rather work at a career than a relationship with a peach like you. You are a really treat. Enjoy your bimbo banging. You will very old and very lonely.

Are all men this angry at women for wanting a career ?

The divorcing mom is treatening us that we will be very old and very lonely ? You see, thesedays a man who marries has still a 60% chance to be very lonely when old. But if we do not marry we can do a lot of that “bimbo banging” and also keep all of our money. Not getting married is a win – win for males. + those women who divorced will be very lonely too once their kids ditch them the way she ditched their father. You can now eithier guilt your kids into staying with you till you die or enjoy your cats.

08-31-2006 02:46 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

GenghisKhan- thanks for your honest answer. NO you didn’t have to explain. I think quite a few women and men are trying to figure out how to make a relationship work and last. I feel that you have to be on the same page as a couple. Be sure you agree on what you want for your life and your family’s life.

I grew up in the same family model as you and it was a fantastic upbringing. Those were the days when it did not matter if you were wearing Versace or Sears or if your car was brand new or not. When did that all change?
I have been torn by having a career vs staying at home. I have my career and enjoy it but do relish my days at home with my child and so on.

08-31-2006 02:51 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
GenghisKhan
Regular Contributor
GenghisKhan
2. The men on these boards are wealthier, probably conservative/traditional, and haven’t quite gotten used to the idea of women as actual people.
____________________________________________________

While I do agree that I find myself falling into this category based on your definition. I don’t agree that I would not view woman as actual people. I think its great that they have the right to choose these days what they want out of life. When I marry I would be looking for a spouse that sees the value in being a housewife and raising children. I would do what my parents did – share everything and make decisions together. I don’t see how this is viewing a woman as less than a person.

08-31-2006 02:57 PM

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Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

I am not treating ALL of you as if you will be old and lonley. Just the one’s who feel the need to portray “career women” as typical and all willing to be his bimbo. I don’t have any problem with any man wanting a nice wife. If she stays at home it is your choice as a family unit.

FYI Cassius- this divorced mom IS happy not lonely. I have a wonderful husband and 3 new children in my house. And HAHA may stay home to take care of it and them….

And the cat died.

I am asking these questions to yet again figure you guys out. Aren’t you glad some of us are even curious ?

08-31-2006 03:08 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
phatkat811
Regular Contributor
phatkat811
I don’t know anyone like the guys here. The guys I know would all be just fine – even happy – with marrying a career woman, especially if it was a career doing what she loved.

08-31-2006 03:17 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

Yes, I am very wealthy but I am a fiscal conservative and a social liberal.   I support choice, I know our current administration is chock full of chickenhawks and criminals, I am an agnostic, I am a former officer and pilot, etc.  But I am not a fool and am quite well aware of what works and what does not work and that family law is predisposed against men so I prefer my girlfriend and noncommittal sex over signing a piece of paper and putting myself in harms way.

08-31-2006 03:21 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
ftesyektsi
Regular Contributor
ftesyektsi

GenghisKhan wrote:
2. The men on these boards are wealthier, probably conservative/traditional, and haven’t quite gotten used to the idea of women as actual people.
____________________________________________________

While I do agree that I find myself falling into this category based on your definition. I don’t agree that I would not view woman as actual people. I think its great that they have the right to choose these days what they want out of life. When I marry I would be looking for a spouse that sees the value in being a housewife and raising children. I would do what my parents did – share everything and make decisions together. I don’t see how this is viewing a woman as less than a person.

I should have taken my own advice and clarified I meant SOME of the men on these boards.  I see nothing wrong with having a certain family type in mind…my post was referring to the more angry, hysterical, and bitter ones in the bunch.

08-31-2006 03:21 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
ftesyektsi
Regular Contributor
ftesyektsi

moneyneversleep wrote:
Yes, I am very wealthy but I am a fiscal conservative and a social liberal.   I support choice, I know our current administration is chock full of chickenhawks and criminals, I am an agnostic, I am a former officer and pilot, etc.  But I am not a fool and am quite well aware of what works and what does not work and that family law is predisposed against men so I prefer my girlfriend and noncommittal sex over signing a piece of paper and putting myself in harms way.

Please define “noncommittal sex.”  If you have a girlfriend, you’re in a committed relationship (commitment does not necessarily mean “marriage”).  Do you think “noncommittal sex” means “sex which will not lead to marriage”?

Look up “noncommittal” in the dictionary.  If that’s the type of sex you’re having, I feel kind of sorry for your woman’s sex life.

08-31-2006 03:23 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

Noncommittal = not getting married. It is much less problematic than being forced to pay a $50K retainer to family law counsel.  In my situation if she is problematic I walk without consequence.

08-31-2006 03:31 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

Well to each his or her own.

The discussion is more about getting married to someone not avoiding it. If you don’t intend on ever getting married then you may want to keep your noncomittal nose out.

08-31-2006 03:36 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

Problematic ? like a business arrangement.

08-31-2006 03:38 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

Marriage IS the formation of a corporation.  Any person with an ounce of sense knows that.

08-31-2006 03:40 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

I know that very well as I am divorced and remarried.

Problematic is a very cold word when referring to a relationship with another person. It seems as if you’d have a very easy time tossing the relationship in  the trash like a bad proposal at work…

It’s your life and I respect your choices for you.

08-31-2006 03:47 PM

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Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
GenghisKhan
Regular Contributor
GenghisKhan
Problematic is a very cold word when referring to a relationship with another person. It seems as if you’d have a very easy time tossing the relationship in the trash like a bad proposal at work…
____________________________________________________

I agree. But the problem is today’s social and legal climate has made marriage for men a high liability if it goes wrong and punishes him severly for his decision to marry. So I hope you can understand why many of us would choose to emphasize more of the contractual, cost-benfefit, business aspects of marriage over the love, emotional, spiritual aspects of marriage.

Message Edited by GenghisKhan on 08-31-2006 03:55 PM

08-31-2006 03:54 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

I do understand believe me-
again gone are the days of our folks.

08-31-2006 04:02 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
moneyneversleep
Regular Contributor
moneyneversleep

What were the issues you were most concerned about when you decided to get a divorce? I am sure distribution of assets was amongst the first 2.   Why did you decide to divorce and did you or your husband intiate the proceedings?    You will see I am right.

08-31-2006 04:04 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
toadman
Regular Contributor
toadman

Back on thread topic:

Do you know us or run into us? More than you know. We’re those guys.  You know, the supposedly “gay” ones or with “issues” who have no interest in a recap of daily business events and incessant interruption cell/text calls. We’re looking for any reason to excuse ourselves from your droll and career-self-absorbed company.

We’re the guys saying thanks but ‘no thanks’.

Message Edited by toadman on 08-31-2006 04:49 PM

08-31-2006 04:48 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
earthlaughs
Contributor
earthlaughs

Annabel25 wrote:I’ve got to say that I don’t. For most of my friends and colleagues, the issue of dating “career women” is just not even on the radar. And as for thinking that it is a woman’s role to be a homemaker and women should “subjugate” themselves to men, I have never met ANYONE who thinks like that.

No. If I knew people who thought this way, I’d stop associating with them. And I don’t think blaming it on a bad divorce flies. I know a man who went home from work one day to find his wife had packed up and left that day, out of the blue. He was heartbroken, and of course angry and confused. But he still likes women.

Message Edited by earthlaughs on 08-31-2006 01:56 PM

08-31-2006 04:54 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
porkchops38
Regular Contributor
porkchops38
I’ve never had my heartbroken by a woman because i’ve never given my heart to a woman! LMAO! Since I was 18 years old I’ve seen honest decent men get worked-over good by their wives for doing nothing more than working their azzzes off! You see it once, you think it’s an aberration, you see it twice-you think it might be a pattern developing, you see it three times-you start asking questions, you see it four times-people start answering your questions, you see it five times-you say to yourself “maybe marriage could be different for me because I’m not a bad guy”, you see it seven times-and you say “Scratch that previous brain-fart, I’ve just seen 7 good, decent, hard-working guys get azz-raped by their wives through no fault of their own”, and then you say, “I don’t need to see it anymore, because I’m not ever going to marry a westernized woman!” And the man lived happily ever after. The End. 🙂

08-31-2006 06:38 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
MartianBachelor
Regular Contributor
MartianBachelor

ftesyektsi wrote: …I discussed this last night with a friend, and here were the prevailing theories:

1. The men on these boards are of a very specific demographic. Career-types in the city, maybe being confronted by women in the workforce who are equally aggressive and ambitious and who pose a threat. Maybe the men are thinking back to the good ol’ days when the only ones they had to compete with were one another.

2. The men on these boards are wealthier, probably conservative/traditional, and haven’t quite gotten used to the idea of women as actual people.

Two lousy lame wrong theories? That was all you were able to come up with between the two of you?

I’m glad we’re not counting on the likes of you to come up with fusion power or fix the greenhouse effect or something that matters.

I suppose it’s beyond your powers of imagination to conceive of the idea that maybe we’re the radicals and progressives, and you’re the stick-in-the-mud traditional conservatives defending your privileged position in the rickety old status quo. Instead of trying to explain us away, perhaps you should endeavor to understand us because the real tsunami hasn’t hit yet.

Message Edited by MartianBachelor on 08-31-2006 06:11 PM

______________________________________________
“The loudest, most strident voices calling women weak, stupid, and incapable of competing in the world at large are the feminists.” – zed the zen priest

08-31-2006 08:02 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Isis
Contributor
Isis
No, but then I work in a nonprofit and live in Brooklyn. This whole thing has been fascinating to me.

I find I am not just fascinated by the men who are angry and lonely and unhappy, but also by the stories of some really scary women. The people where I work, men and women, are for the most part supportive, thoughtful and considerate.

A bit of an education for me.

Message Edited by Isis on 08-31-2006 08:27 PM

08-31-2006 08:09 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Cassius
Regular Contributor
Cassius

HSC wrote:
I am not treating ALL of you as if you will be old and lonley. Just the one’s who feel the need to portray “career women” as typical and all willing to be his bimbo. I don’t have any problem with any man wanting a nice wife. If she stays at home it is your choice as a family unit.

FYI Cassius- this divorced mom IS happy not lonely. I have a wonderful husband and 3 new children in my house. And HAHA may stay home to take care of it and them….

And the cat died.

I am asking these questions to yet again figure you guys out. Aren’t you glad some of us are even curious ?

So you found yet another guy who will put up with paying alimony, child support and leaving the house. Good for you.

08-31-2006 11:08 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
ftesyektsi
Regular Contributor
ftesyektsi

MartianBachelor wrote:

ftesyektsi wrote: …I discussed this last night with a friend, and here were the prevailing theories:

1. The men on these boards are of a very specific demographic. Career-types in the city, maybe being confronted by women in the workforce who are equally aggressive and ambitious and who pose a threat. Maybe the men are thinking back to the good ol’ days when the only ones they had to compete with were one another.

2. The men on these boards are wealthier, probably conservative/traditional, and haven’t quite gotten used to the idea of women as actual people.

Two lousy lame wrong theories? That was all you were able to come up with between the two of you?

I’m glad we’re not counting on the likes of you to come up with fusion power or fix the greenhouse effect or something that matters.

I suppose it’s beyond your powers of imagination to conceive of the idea that maybe we’re the radicals and progressives, and you’re the stick-in-the-mud traditional conservatives defending your privileged position in the rickety old status quo. Instead of trying to explain us away, perhaps you should endeavor to understand us because the real tsunami hasn’t hit yet.

Message Edited by MartianBachelor on 08-31-2006 06:11 PM

I would happily try to understand the position of someone who can explain it in a way that doesn’t include insults and/or fallacies.  Honesty is wonderful…when it’s expressed calmly.  No one WANTS to try to understand someone who is screaming at them.

09-01-2006 09:28 AM

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Reader Response to “Don’t Marry Career Women” – Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
HSC
Contributor
HSC

Actually Cassius – He gives me nothing, I don’t need it. The child support is just that – “child support” it all goes into a college fund for our child.

I am not evil like the rest of these women you point at with your angry finger. I have my priorities straight. I love my husband with all I’ve got. I love our combined family deeply. I take great pride in my home & my work and it all works fantastically. He is thrilled to have someone to talk to about his work who can relate on his level.  We work together to have happy kids and maintain a lovely home. We’ve had many discussions about my staying home and we are not convinced it is the best choice for us but still are considering it.

He is a senior executive whose ex was a stay at home wife and she bored him to tears and did nothing but complain that he never helped at home. Additionally, she never gave him a nickel of credit for working as hard as he did to provide for them.

Unlike the other career woman that I’ve seen described in here my 8:30 am to what ever time career ends when I walk through the my front door at home or when I pick up my child at the end of her day. The PDA is put away, My family is the focus for the remainder of the day. There are a ton of other women like me out there, I don’t claim to be the only person who managers her/his life this way.

09-01-2006 10:28 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
leeraconteur
Regular Contributor
leeraconteur

No one WANTS to try to understand someone who is screaming at them.

Yet that is PRECISELY the technique feminists used to push their ideas onto the rest of us.

That is PRECISELY what it appears like when women post insults and no counter argument.  They attempt to win with volume and smear.  If their arguments were so compelling, then volume and smear wouldn’t be needed.

This isn’t even debatable; the video footage is extensive of RadFems screaming down opposition.

09-01-2006 04:05 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
IshWishDish
Regular Contributor
IshWishDish

So, we just go with the fascist matriarchal system and smile at you and tell you nice pretty words when face to face, all the while working, saving, investing, enjoying life, and making certain that we don’t invite a western fascist cat-loving nazi woman into our lives in any permanent way, to ruin it.

I, for one, would like to thank you for this. You’re a hero, really. And the tragedy is, due to the silence you must maintain to protect your very life, you will go forever unsung. The women you date, as they fume and cry and rant to their girlfriends about how you lied your way into their pants and then disappeared, will never know the great gift you’ve given them in the silence of their telephones.  <wipes tear from eye>

09-01-2006 05:09 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
ftesyektsi
Regular Contributor
ftesyektsi

leeraconteur wrote:
No one WANTS to try to understand someone who is screaming at them.

Yet that is PRECISELY the technique feminists used to push their ideas onto the rest of us. So, you’re thinking, “THEY do it, so I’M gonna do it!  Aghghghghgh!”?

That is PRECISELY what it appears like when women post insults and no counter argument.  Where?  Can you direct me to said posts? They attempt to win with volume and smear. “They” who, specifically?  And, again, where?  If their arguments were so compelling, then volume and smear wouldn’t be needed.

This isn’t even debatable; the video footage is extensive of RadFems screaming down opposition. What??

Now that you’ve cleared that up (I guess), how about getting back to the actual discussion?

09-01-2006 05:28 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
leeraconteur
Regular Contributor
leeraconteur

leeraconteur wrote:
No one WANTS to try to understand someone who is screaming at them.

Yet that is PRECISELY the technique feminists used to push their ideas onto the rest of us. So, you’re thinking, “THEY do it, so I’M gonna do it!  Aghghghghgh!”?

I don’t scream.

That is PRECISELY what it appears like when women and their supporters post insults and no counter argument.  Where?  Can you direct me to said posts?

Sure thing.  I must point out that at no time in this forum has a single woman or their supporter posted any rebuttal to Noer’s Thesis with study support.  I am beginning to suspect that you just repeatedly ask others to justify their argument with multiple requests for support and direction to said posts.

Yet you won’t hold yourself to the same standard.

Frankly, that dog won’t hunt anymore.

If you disagree, you’ll have to do more than insult and make multiple requests for us to prove our point.  You have to prove your point.

Support:

http://forums.forbes.com/forbes/board/message?board.id=respond_marry_career_woman&message.id=1193&page=1

My jaw is on the the FLOOR that the schmuck who wrote this piece is an editor here (or THE editor)?

Let’s not even get into the whole issue about women who don’t have career NEEDING to stay with rotten, abusive, cheating husbadns because they don’t have the financial wherewithal to leave.

PS To all the “happy housewives” here – I hope you’re prepared for the day your husband leave you or dies, since you’re going to be up a creek without a paddle with no career skills to support you later in life.

http://forums.forbes.com/forbes/board/message?board.id=respond_marry_career_woman&message.id=2&page=1
What a misogynistic load of crap. I don’t even know where to begin in responding to this, except to say that many of the criticisms leveled at career women go double for career men. To single out career women, especially when women remain repressed, underpaid, underappreciated and exploited in this society is sexist and irresponsible. Shame on you!

Holy freakin cow – there are soo many things wrong about this article – it’s flat out retarded. Basically all of us women that can make it on our own are screwed when it comes to the ideal of a successful future partnership. It also says that men are lazy and because we can’t wipe their noses, they’ll get sick more. That because we make more, they’ll feel emasculated, that because we’re smart – we’ll cheat, that because we’ll be earning money we won’t have time to sweep the floor and nevermind the fact that there is another human being in the house who can also hold a broom. That men should essentially look for TJ Maxx cashiers that will do anything for them because they hold the pocketbook.

These womens careers ARE wiping men’s butts, bearing children, and ultimately giving men the power or at least the sense of entitlement that the other sex commands. My god, there is just sooooo much wrong this, I don’t know how to internalize it.

I want to break something … Or at the very least find that job opening at Tastee Freeze and get myself a man!

http://forums.forbes.com/forbes/board/message?board.id=respond_marry_career_woman&message.id=20

The fact that most adult men in their 30s are currently unable to take care of themselves financially, domestically and emotionally is not addressed.

http://forums.forbes.com/forbes/board/message?board.id=respond_marry_career_woman&message.id=77

When you lower yourself to printing articles that contain extremist, antiquated, hateful points of view, your reputation becomes tarnished.

So the author is a shmuck, SAHW have husbands who are abusive or will leave, men in their 30’s are unable to take care of themselves, and the article is extremist and hateful, written by a misogynist.

That looks like insults, without counter arguments in the OP, to me.

Game, Set, Match.

Have a nice day.

Message Edited by leeraconteur on 09-01-2006 09:12 PM

09-01-2006 07:25 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
IshWishDish
Regular Contributor
IshWishDish

So the author is a shmuck, SAHW have husbands who are abusive or will leave, men in their 30’s are unable to take care of themselves, and the article is extremist and hateful, written by a misogynist.

That looks like insults, without counter arguments in the OP, to me.

The nerve of those women! Next thing you know, they’ll be calling him fat, ugly, gay, stupid, “crackwhore” and maybe even my personal favorite: “nature’s abberation.”

If you didn’t get it (and I’m really not going to assume you would at this point), those are just a few of the more frequent things the guys on this board have called the girls. Except for the “abberation” one. To my knowledge, that one was only used once. I just liked it so much I had to throw it in. Y’all would stand to get a lot more sympathy for all the mean stuff those bad women have said to you if you’d stop throwing stuff like that out every time you can’t think of anything else to say.

Game, Set, Match.

I love it when you guys declare victory like that. Especially when you use a sports metaphor. It makes you look so very much like a bunch of junior high kids.

09-01-2006 10:35 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
Pete
Regular Contributor
Pete

HSC wrote:

Actually Cassius – He gives me nothing, I don’t need it. The child support is just that – “child support” it all goes into a college fund for our child.

I am not evil like the rest of these women you point at with your angry finger. I have my priorities straight. I love my husband with all I’ve got. I love our combined family deeply. I take great pride in my home & my work and it all works fantastically. He is thrilled to have someone to talk to about his work who can relate on his level. We work together to have happy kids and maintain a lovely home. We’ve had many discussions about my staying home and we are not convinced it is the best choice for us but still are considering it.

He is a senior executive whose ex was a stay at home wife and she bored him to tears and did nothing but complain that he never helped at home. Additionally, she never gave him a nickel of credit for working as hard as he did to provide for them.

Unlike the other career woman that I’ve seen described in here my 8:30 am to what ever time career ends when I walk through the my front door at home or when I pick up my child at the end of her day. The PDA is put away, My family is the focus for the remainder of the day. There are a ton of other women like me out there, I don’t claim to be the only person who managers her/his life this way.

Frankly, I don’t find you to be a very reliable or credible source for how good your marriage is.

For one thing, you already failed in one marriage – that’s a major deal breaker right there. More than you probably realize.

For another, you display a very poor personality here, which raises serious doubts about just what kind of wife you really are to your current husband – or were to your previous husband.

Understand this: you speak only for yourself, NOT for your husband. The only way to tell whether or not he is “thrilled” about you is if we hear from him directly, outside your presense. It is HIS evaluation of YOU – rather than your self-regard – that serves as the most reliable indicator of how worthy you are as a wife.

09-02-2006 05:23 PM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
DontMarryNoer
Regular Contributor
DontMarryNoer

Antiriad wrote:

BeachBagLady wrote:
It’s the neighborhood guys who have the problem with it – they don’t understand how he can be ‘manly/macho with an apron on’. Talk about neanderthal thinking – like them pulling a paycheck equates to their manliness or makes them better lovers. Yeah, right. The wives talk – so I know THAT ain’t true…

Talk about pinko fascist feminazi thinking; your husband is whipped, it doesn’t matter what words you use to describe it or what words he uses to describe it. You both live in a fundamentally delusional and absurd paradigm that is bound to fail in the long run. Your ancestors will look with shame at the way you lived.

See how its always men who keep other men down when they are down? Don’t tell this to MRAs or their heads might explode.

09-03-2006 10:30 AM

Re: Women: do you actually know anyone like these guys in real life?
leeraconteur
Regular Contributor
leeraconteur

If you didn’t get it (and I’m really not going to assume you would at this point), those are just a few of the more frequent things the guys on this board have called the girls.

The point is that I was responding to an assertion that I do such things.

I do not.

09-03-2006 02:29 PM

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